Sam's Awesome Guide Filled With Stuff

This is my essential guide(handbook, bible,encyclopedia) for random stuff, things, IDK etc...!
To start off I thought I might do a guide to FREEWARE!!!!!

Office Suites
May favourite Office Suites are OpenOffice and IBM Lotus Symphony.
OpenOffice is the better of the two, it has a nice clean interface and lots of features.
http://www.openoffice.org/
IBM Lotus

Photo Editor
My favourite is GIMP. A very good program packed with features. A tiny bit difficult to use though
http://www.gimp.org/

Misc
For this program I just pasted the review from their website
FreeCommander is an easy-to-use alternative to the standard windows file manager. The program helps you with daily work in Windows. Here you can find all the necessary functions to manage your data stock. You can take FreeCommander anywhere - just copy the installation directory on a CD or USB-Stick - and you can even work with this program on a foreign computer.
Main features in FreeCommander:

Dual-panel technology - horizontal and vertical
Tabbed interface
Optional tree view for each panel
Built in file viewer to view files in hex, binary, text or image format
File viewer inside archives too
Built in archive handling: ZIP (read, write), CAB (read, write), RAR (read)
Nested archive handling
Built in FTP client
Easy access to system folders, control panel, desktop and start menu
Copy, move, delete, rename files and folders
Multi rename tool
Wipe files
Create and verify MD5 checksums
File splitting
File properties and context menu
Calculation of folder size
Folder comparison / synchronization
Modification of file date and attributes
Folder / program favorites
File searching (inside archive too)
File filters for display
User defined columns for detailed view
DOS command line
Multiple language support


http://www.freecommander.com/
(for people with XP)
Visual Task Tips was designed to be a simple lightweight shell enhancement utility. It provides a thumbnail preview image for each task in the Windows Taskbar, like in Microsoft Windows Vista.
http://www.freewarefiles.com/Visual-Task-Tips_program_34978.html

I hope you guys download some of this great freeware!!!
TTFN ( Ta Ta For Now) :)

Spam bot. BURN THE WITCH!!!!!

I was just bored so did this, cool isn't it.

In all honesty, ive been looking to replace Office 2007 on my computer for some time now.
Already tried Abiword (not very good for .doc files) and i dont fancy linux incase i mess something up my system.

If you recommend Open Office then thats good enough for me!
Ill have a play around with it at the weekend and see how it goes! :)

I like Open Office, it works basically the same as Word.

But I have the Microsoft Office Blue Edition, so I'd rather use that.

But if you don't have MS Office, Open Office is good and free.

Yeah, I got it for my other computer. And it can run any MS docs, so it doesn't matter if you need to use MS somewhere else.

I COPIED THIS(isnt piracy great)
101 FUN THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART(or the local equivilent)

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.

2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.

3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.

4. Start playing Calvinball; see how many people you can get to join in.

5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.

6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.

7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.

8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.

9. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles.

10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, “I think we’ve got a Code 3 in Housewares,” and see what happens.

11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to “10″.

12. Play with the automatic doors.

13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, “Hi! I haven’t seen you in so long!…” etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.

14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, “Who BUYS this junk, anyway?”

15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.

16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you’re taking it for a “test drive.”

17. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.

18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.

19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, “Wow. Magic!”

20. Put M&M’s on layaway.

21. Move “Caution: Wet Floor” signs to carpeted areas.

22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you’ll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.

23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can “catch” from the other aisles.

24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying,”…I’m Batman. Come, Robin, to the Batcave!”

26. TP as much of the store as possible.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.

28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell “hello” upside down.

29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, “Why won’t you people just leave me alone?”

30. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., “Do you have any Shnerples here?”

31. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.

32. Take bets on the battle described above.

33. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

34. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from “Mission: Impossible.”

35. Run up to an employee (preferably a male) while squeezing your legs together and practically yell at him ” I need some tampons!!”

36. Try on bras in the sewing/fabric department.

37. Try on bras over top of your clothes.

38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.

39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.

40. Say things like, “Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?”

41. Set up a “Valet Parking” sign in front of the store.

42. Two words: “Marco Polo.”

43. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.

44. “Re-alphabetize” the CD’s in Electronics.

45. Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms

46. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.

47. Relax in the patio furniture and open the patio umbrella until you get kicked out.

48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, “No, no! It’s those voices again!”

49. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.

50. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don’t get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.

51. While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible “sex and candy”

52. Try putting different pairs of women’s panties on your head and walk around the store casually.

53. Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of the mannequins.

54. Nonchalantly “test” the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.

55. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, “Red Rover!”

56. Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.

57. Set up another battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. G.I. Janes. (Red lipstick might give an interesting effect!!!)

58. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.

59. While no one’s watching quickly switch the men’s and women’s signs on the doors of the rest room.

60. Fill your cart with boxes of condoms, and watch everyone’s jaws drop when you attempt to buy them.

61. In the auto department, practice your “Madonna” look with various funnels.

62. Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like “the fat man walks alone,” and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them

63. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Ex: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying “How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew there was another girl, but I thought I had won. You kissed ME darling.” Then act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions.

64. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.

65. Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying “Good girl, good bessie.”

66. Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putiing one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles.

67. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

68. In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with another girl and start flirting with him in that annoying, ditsy way. “hi!!!! (giggle) What’s your sign?(giggle).” When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. “hi!!!! (giggle) What’s your sign?(giggle).”

69. Get boxes of Condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they don’t realize it!

70. Walk around the perfume department with a bottle of super strong perfume and spray people as they walk by. Lean in and sniff them then jump back and wave your hand in front of your nose and saying “Oh god, your over powering the perfume!!”

71. Hit on the elderly.

73. In the food aisle, pretend like there’s a little bug, slowly move your head to the right, then swing your head to the left as if your trying to follow it. Slowly lower your head to the ground, then start spinning around in circles stomping like crazy. Then finally yell out “Yes!!! I got it!!! Wow, that was the biggest Cockrouch I’ve ever seen, i think it was pregnant!!! Hey look, there’s another one!!!” Then Repeat.

74. Repeat 73 with a can of bug spray.

75. Crawl around on the ground and pretend that your a cat. Meow when people walk by, rub up against their legs, etc.

76. Ride around on those electric cars and pretend that your a prissy English Man. Say things like “Cheerio, good man.” to people who walk by. And don’t forget to have perfect posture.

77. Start grunting like Beavis and Butthead while chasing your friends up and down aisles trying to run over them with those electric cars. Make sure to tell your friends to act like they don’t know you.

78. Spend all your money riding on those little rides for toddlers. Fit the character; if your on a hoarse, then pretend that your a cowboy, etc.. And If a little kid comes over wanting to use it, start barking at them until they run away crying.

79. Have silly string fights with a friend. Hide behind customers and “accidentally” hit the people instead of your friend.

80. Excesively use anything thing that says “Try Me”.

81. Start pocketing any and all free samples.

82. Draw mustaches on all the pictures and mannequins.

82. Walk up to the customer service and when they say “Hello, how may I help you?” say “Yes, I’ll have a Quarter Pounder with cheese, one strawberry shake, a large order of french fries and a diet coke.” And when they start to talk, say “Oh, to go”. Then when they say that they can’t give it to you say “Oh, This is because I’m gay isn’t it? I’d expect this from Caldors, but not Walmart. People who are gay are just like everyone else your know. You disgust me” Then walk away mumbling to yourself. If your a guy, try to act as valley-girl-like as you can

83. Start to madly scratch yourself and walk up to people asking where the rash cream is because your family and all your friends seem to have a rash too.

84. When your alone, have loud conversations with your “multiple personalities”. Have an English man, a Southern person, someone from New York, a Grandma, and a 5 year old girl all at the same time. You have to use accents. They should sound like this: “Great idea good fellow, we shall have a jolly good time.(English)” “Look, oall I wanna do, is wok ta Stawbucks and git a cawfee(New York)” Etc.

85. Start “dancing” like mad. Basically, just wail your arms and legs around like your having some kind of massive seizure.

86. Try on crazy costumes and walk casually through the store.

87. Stick your arm in your jacket and suspiciously start to leave the store. Get really tense and start to lean over as your walking through the doors As if your suspecting the alarms to go off. Then when it doesn’t go off, let out a big sigh. Then quickly look around you to see who’s watching and run away as fast as your can.

88. Balance EVERYTHING you see on the tips of your finger, your nose, your forehead, and the top of your head while singing the circus song.

89. Put jockstraps in the lingerie department

90. Put lingerie in the men’s department.

91. Put super sexy lingerie in old men’s carts when they turn around.

92. When your alone, start screaming help and yelling that someone istrying to rape you. Then when everyone runs over, start crying and saying “All I ever wanted was a little attention” Then run away crying.

93. Spend hours staring at a little blinking light. After a while, start saying blink everytime it blinks. Don’t look away, just stay mesmerized.

94. Walk up to a lady and calmly say “Help me. The voices in my head are telling me to do naughty things.” Then clap your hands over your ears, fly yell head around and start screaming “NO!!! I DON’T WANT TO HURT THE NICE LADY NO NO NO NO!!!!” Then suddenly stop, look her straight in the eyes, and Calmly say “I…will start…a fire…” The pull out a zippo and start laughing hysterically in an evil way. But don’t light the zippo, just hold it closed.

95. Light a match under a spinkler.

96. Walk up to someone and say “Oh, so your back for more. I warned you never to come back here. Wait here while i go get my shot gun”. Then walk away.

97. Walk up to a guy and say “Oh my god, is it you? Oh my god it is!!! I haven’t seen you in so long!!!!” Then kiss him. Then slap and him say “Why didn’t you ever call me??” Then walk away. Much more affective if you’re a guy.

98. Stand next to a maniquin and pretend that your a mannequin. Try to hold the same position for as long as possible. Then finally as someone is walking by, check your watch and say. “Finally, my shift is done. I really don’t get paid enough to do this”

99. Start singing oldies songs in to megaphone.

100. Act like your about to cry and ask people “Have you seen my mommy?”

101. Steal a Walmart shirt. The possibilities are endless.

BONUS* Attempt all of the above during the same visit.

I used to work in retail security ... glad it wasnt in your neighbourhood!

Fancy a lift to the local Tesco this afternoon? *lol*

Psikyo Fox wrote:

I used to work in retail security ... glad it wasnt in your neighbourhood!

Fancy a lift to the local Tesco this afternoon? *lol*

Tesco hmmmmmmm, an Englishman?

lego1995 wrote:

Tesco hmmmmmmm, an Englishman?

Yeah, made in the midlands! :)
But my mums half-German and my dads Irish.

Psikyo Fox wrote:

lego1995 wrote:

Tesco hmmmmmmm, an Englishman?

Yeah, made in the midlands! :)
But my mums half-German and my dads Irish.

IRISH born and bred(with a Canadian dad)

My list of games I consider the the best I have ever played and I would recommend as the necessary essentials for any self respecting gamer.

Gameboy Advance+ Nintendo DS
1. The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap GBA
2. Mario Golf: Advance Tour GBA
3. Professor Layton and Pandora's Box NDS (all games in the series are good)
4. Sonic Advance 3 GBA
Xbox + Xbox 360
5. PGR3
6. Lego Star Wars: The Video Game
Wii
7. Lego Star Wars: The Complete Saga
8. Mario Kart
PS3 (I am new to Sony so this will be short)
9. Uncharted 3( this is possible the best game I have ever played, I can not put into words how good this game is)
PC
10. Red Alert 2 (3 made a muck up)
11. Age of Empires 1+2 (avoid 3 at all cost)
12. Star Wars Battlefront (you could get 2, it provides a similar experience but it is not near as good as 1)
13. Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic (EPIC the best RPG ever, buy this game,buy it, hours of nail biting decisions on multiple choice question for which you will have to face the consequences of)
14. Zoo Tycoon

Not a long list but those are some REALLY good games, if you guys have not played them and you find a copy someplace, I beg you for your own sake, get them.

@ the stuff to do in Wal-Mart

# 7, lol typewriters?

#72... hit on 5 year olds? Not even for a joke...

Marvelous Mark wrote:

#72... hit on 5 year olds? Not even for a joke...

You are right about that. I should have edited that out, cause that is a bit weird

In anticipation of the new Lego Batman DC Universe game I thought I might list the current Lego games in order from fun to a bit boring

1. LEGO Star Wars The Complete Saga (The first three episodes of thist game are brilliant but the last three are not quite as good but still a lot of fun.)
2. LEGO Indiana Jones (It was hard putting this in second, this game is amazing, running around with a whip is sooooo fun)
3. LEGO Batman (The levels themselves are sometimes a bit tedious but the the characters are so iconic and that makes the games well worth playing)
4.LEGO Pirates of the Carribean (For starters you can play as Elizabeth Swan aka Keira Knightley and if that does not much you enjoy the game nothing will, plus the levels are all very fun)
5. LEGO Star Wars 3 The Clone Wars (OK, here is where the games stop being so amazing, they are still a lot of fun but they can be boring, LEGO ST3 was IMO an experimental game in some ways so that leaves the game open to a lot of criticism in some areas but there were still some great new features)
6. LEGO Indiana Jones 2 (As an avid fan of LEGO it hard for me to say that this game is quite boring, sure it did have cool new features, but it was still boring)
7. LEGO Harry Potter (There are two Harry Potters and both of them are horrible and should be avoided, please do not waste your money on these horrible games)
Please let me know what LEGO games you like and if you agree or disagree with this little list :)